Even a journey of 1000 miles begins with one step, or so the old saying goes, so here is my first step. I have a direction but not a road map so I cannot tell you in detail what my blog will be about but I can try to give you the birds eye view.
Firstly who am I, well my name will most likely not be familiar to you
but so that we are on friendly terms, it is Tony Leake. What do I do and
why am I writing this would be a reasonable next couple of questions. Well
currently (but not for long) I am a software developer and a Director of
a smallish company that sells 'stuff' on the internet. We do pretty well
and I'd always wanted to be a Director of something so this all fitted
very well for me. It was great, being a Director made me feel very important until
the day that I realized the only thing that it really meant for me was
that it was now mandatory for me to complete a tax return.
About 18 months ago now I was introduced to personal development by a
very good friend. That day changed my life (as have many things since)
but I didn't realize it at the time. I guess it was true to say that I wasn't feeling like I was
getting much out of life. Oh don't get me wrong I had nothing to
complain about, a wonderful wife, 2 amazing children who I love very much and they love and support me
too, while not being what I would call wealthy we did not have money
worries and live in a nice house with 2 cars and got away on a couple of holidays a year. I know there
are many people in the world who would feel amazingly blessed to have my
life but for some reason, I didn't.
I never knew really that there was such a thing as personal development,
reading inspirational and motivational books, many many audios teaching
enlightenment and goals, seminars to go to and new friends to make. And there it was, goal setting was my
first huge discovery. I wasn't enjoying life because I didn't know what I
wanted from it. Every day was the same get up, go to work and see what happens. Suddenly I could choose what I
wanted to do, even things that I didn't think possible before and live
once again began to have purpose.
Then the blocks, the brick walls, the ceiling crashing down and I
remembered why I had stopped having goals. I simply wasn't very good at
achieving them. Oh I'd had lots of goals in the past but not many reached, somehow I would always fall over at the
finish line, or get halfway through a goal and get distracted by
something else. Nothing wrong with changing your mind but when it's every time you begin to achieve anything something is wrong.
So the personal development had taken me to a place where I had goals
again, I had a purpose in life and a bleief that I could achieve
anything that I want. So why doesn't it work, it works for others, I've seen it. I have a pretty good IQ, I've always
been pretty lucky, being in the right place at the right time, and now
I've changed my thinking from being mostly negative to being positive most of the time. So why could I not achieve my goals?
This is where the real journey begins, the one of self discovery. Why do
I get close to a goal and then begin to doubt myself, why do I start a
project with gusto and then suddenly lose motivation and convince myself that I didn't really want to do that in
the first place. Why do I find myself suddenly getting frustrated or
angry for no reason. Why do seem to get more stressed than other people, why do I (secretly) feel inferior in many ways to other
people. Why can I (in my mind) make a fantastic speech in front of a
group of people, and even come up with the words, I can be interesting, engaging, charming and the words just flow to me. Then when
I try to do it for real I just fall flat. Why can other people improve
at golf and I stay at the same beginners level that I have been at for the last 10 years. Well there is no physical reasons for any
of these things but they are very real and not only that, they repeat
over and over again. Different places and people, same situation, same feelings. So it's time for me to discover the answers to these Why's.
As part of my journey I had been introduced to TFT (Thought Field
Therapy) a tapping therapy that had it's roots in the Eastern philosophy
of Energy Systems and Meridian points which is where the familiar acupuncture also stems from. TFT was evolved into EFT
(Emotional Freedom Technique) at the end of the 1980's and for me was
more of a natural fit, I don't know why, it just felt better. EFT could go under a very broad umbrella of 'Energy Work' as could many
other healing modalities, I had come across energy work through my
sister who is a Transformational Breathing practitioner (or facilitator I think may be more correct) and my friend Andrew who
also introduced me to the personal development who is versed in several
healing techniques. Both of which I found highly beneficial and kind of spooky the way that they brought up, or rather
let me release emotions and feeling that somehow seemed to be trapped
inside, but to me EFT was better. It's so simple, so quick and so easy to use in self help, not needed to work with a
practitioner and I made lots of head way. I discovered a 'new' form of
EFT, new because it had slightly evolved from traditional EFT though many many hours and thousands of clients helped. I discovers
it through a book called Energy EFT by Dr Silvia Hartman which I
thoroughly recommend, if EFT was a big cake, then for me Energy EFT is the cherry on the top and it took my self help to a new
level. So much so that by the time I was half way through it I had made
the decision to take a training course to become a practitioner, so that I could take my self help to a deeper level of
understanding. I was answering my Why's and learning so much about
myself, it literally felt like I was unlocking my past and reconnecting with parts of my life that had been long forgotten, and
in many cases, not just forgotten but swept under the carpet because I
preferred not to remember them. I was making friends with my ghosts from the past and even after 20, sometimes 30 or more years was learning from them right here right now.
I began to realize what I had known for a while, software development no
longer interested me. Oh it did in the beginning, I used to wake up in
the middle of the night with an answer to a problem I had been working on, so excited I would have to get up
and either write it down or even fix it them. I used to love to read
about and keep up with the latest technologies, I loved to work on and solve problems. But no longer, in fact it had all become a
little tedious, and I knew that if I stuck with it I was heading right
back to where I began feeling unfulfilled. What I really liked was energy work, and I knew I could be good at it.
As part of my course I was working with practice partners, the
definition of a practice partner is a client who doesn't pay you. I was helping people find their Why's, and at every single session bar
none, the person left feeling better than when they had arrived. I felt
worthwhile, I felt like I was doing something useful in the world and realized that for many many years that is what I have been looking for.
So a month ago with the amazing support of my wife, I took the step and
resigned from my position, and in 6-8 weeks from now I will be starting a
new life as an Energist, helping people with any issues that have where energy or stress plays a part, I will initially be doing this using EFT as my chosen modality.
So back to the original question, what is this blog going to be about.
There may be a little about documenting my progress and transition, but
mostly I want it to be about passing on the wisdom that I learn to anyone who is interested in hearing it, if you use EFT as a self help
tool I will give you tips and insights. I will tell you about people
that I have helped to try to inspire you to use EFT on anything and everything in your life by showing you again and again how
it can effectively help people. I may from time to time venture into
personal development territory but really its all the same thing.
Its all about getting the most from life.